Shattered Dreams

What Is Abuse?


What is domestic abuse and why is abuse against women so prevalent? Domestic violence and abuse is generally broken down into several categories. They all describe describe improper threats and negative interactions between people. The disturbing cycle of abuse tends to generally stay within the parameters of physical abuse, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, neglect, and even self-abuse. Whenever people spend a significant amount of time with someone else, there's an opportunity for abuse to occur.


There are abuse signs to look for in family situations that may result in an abusive relationship as well as spousal abuse and child abuse.  Domestic abuse is used by one partner to gain control over another intimate partner. Abuse knows no bounds and does not discriminate regardless of age, race, religion, sexual orientation, or gender. It can happen whether you are married to your soul mate, living together with the mate of your dreams, or just dating that nice guy you met.




Why Does He Hate Me?


Are there core behavior traits that predispose someone towards domestic violence? Are these irrational characteristics a learned behavior? Experts have been closely studying the human psyche for decades to find out what causes domestic violence to rear its ugly head in a consensual relationship. Being abused as a child or witnessing abuse as a child is the single largest risk factor for later adult abusive behavior. On the flip-side, many abused children do not go on to be abusers themselves.


If you are the unfortunate victim in a situation, do not look at yourself as the trigger to their behavior. Statistics on domestic abuse point to the fact that your abuser already had a problem that was present even before you met him. The erratic emotions may come across as hate towards you but the violence that results has much deeper roots within the personality of the domestic abuser.





Will The Domestic Abuse Ever Stop?


Abusers are similar to bullies who use physical threats and actions to get their way because they are allowed to get away with it. If drugs or alcohol are involved this may only pro-long the situation because these stimulants tend to further unfasten already unstable controls. The chances of you changing or fixing your partners destructive behavior is slim to none.


Many victims don't get help and instead suffer in silence asking themselves how do I stop the violence and abuse directed towards me? A more likely probability is that the longer the victim is with the abuser, the more likely the abuse will continue to be present in that relationship.





Is It My Fault I'm Being Abused?


No adult has the right to put their hands on another adult. So the answer is NO! It is not your fault that you are being abused. The victims are usually the scapegoat for shortcomings present in the abusers personality. Abuse is a form of oppression used to gain control over someone. This has more to do with the abuser than the victim.


Look at the Rihanna and Chris Brown domestic violence case that got a lot of attention. Was it Rihanna's fault that Chris Brown violently struck her? More likely it was Chris Brown that had these personality traits living dormant in him until that moment in the car when he beat up Rihanna. When you look at Ray Rice of the Baltimore Ravens NFL team, you see him violently beat up his now wife in the elevator and drag her out defenseless and unconscious.


These incidents of abuse have more to deal with the abuser than the momentary trigger actions of the victim. So to repeat, NO, it is not your fault that you are being abused by someone who is supposed to love you and care for your best interest.






Claim Your Free Extended Preview of "Antoinette : Shattered Dreams" today.


• Witness a woman's Shattered Dreams and the demise of a good girl going bad.

• Explore the mind and psychological make up of domestic abusers and their victims.

• See how Antoinette serves up her own form of justice in the absence of law enforcement.

• Antoinette : Shattered Dreams is a fast paced story of love, obsession, and REVENGE!



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